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I’m a Muslim and a Christian Men Wants to Marry me, But There is a Problem- Lady Narrates

According to her:

Please hide my identity. This situation is very important and I really need a way out. I am 26 and I would be finishing my youth service very soon. I graduated from Usman Danfodiyo university Sokoto with a First Class in the department of Economics. While I was in school, I was dating this guy who was very nice to me.

We started dating when I was in second year and even though we were just students and uncertain about what life had in store for us, I loved him deeply and was very willing to walk through life’s uncertainties with him. Along the line, I heard a rumor that he was seeing another girl. He was the only child of his family and he was from a wealthy home. On the other hand, my family was just comfortable. We had enough to eat and drink but we wouldn’t be regarded as wealthy. Later on, I heard that he had plans of getting married to the girl. All these while, he was avoiding me. After some time, we met and of course, I asked for explanations regarding all the rumours I’ve heard.

He confirmed he was seeing someone else because his family insisted. We finally broke up and honestly, that incident spoilt my perception of Muslim guys notwithstanding the fact that I’m a Muslim too. Even till I graduated, I stayed away from Muslim guys because I was very traumatized from the experiences in my previous relationship. My mom and my family generally was aware and they helped me to recover. After school, I was posted to an Eastern state for my compulsory one year youth service. I was posted to Anambra State where I was opportuned to meet other guys. I met another Muslim guy who although was nice with was full of himself, he came from a rich home and wouldn’t stop bragging about so many things. He was rich, no one would argue that but he was always ready to make you feel inferior although some other people that knew him said he doesn’t do it intentionally.

He was always talking about his father and his several companies. If that’s not enough, he would talk about how he has traveled to different countries while growing up. It was just too much and I couldn’t wrap my head around the whole thing. In the camp, I also met an Igbo guy who was a Christian. We vibes together. He was polite, nice, humble and good-looking. He was soft spoken and was always willing to listen to people. We got very close in the camp and even after our two weeks stay, we still continued speaking. We were posted to different locations for the one year primary assignment. Both guys kept calling me and we were very good. I was in the same location with my Muslim friend while the Igbo boy was posted in another location that isn’t so far from where we were staying. Both of them have made their intentions known to me and I don’t even know what to do about it.

I have told my mom because I am very close to her. I really do not like the Muslim guy so much to marry him but for the Other guy, he is everything I want in a man. He gives me peace of mind and I can’t help but fall in love with him. My mom is of the opinion that I should go for the Muslim guy because it will be easier for us to coexist since we share the same religion. I have tried to explain to her so many times that I don’t love him enough to marry him but she keeps insisting that he is the best option for me.

I know that she is doing all that because of the religion and also because he was from a wealthy home. I don’t want her to make the decision for me but she won’t give up. Apart from her, my dad is a strong Muslim and I don’t know how he will react. I know he will refuse and I don’t know how I will handle that because my dad is so difficult. I really don’t know what to do. I love the Christian guy more. How do I convince my parents?

2 Comments

  1. My advice is don’t let religion take your happiness. Leave religion aside and go with what your heart desires because it’s from happiness where your marriage will be successful. That institution #marriage needs someone who is happy and free with each other. Don’t enter the marriage where you don’t feel your self.
    And if your parents are understanding, they will be conversant with it. Religion is nothing afteroll we all believe in one God/Allah.

  2. Assalamualaikum warahumaturahi wabarakatuhu. In Islam, assuming you know the basics , and that it is a complete way of life, that we live in Islam and that Islam lives in us . The basics are you marry a marry because of his faith ie how strong his is in practicing the Deen ie Islam, and secondly his characters. The rest can be suplimentary. In your case you have problems with the guy’s characters, a factor that you need to consider. I think be patient another good Muslim guy will come your way. Can the Christian guy accept to revert to Islam first before u can marry him, have u ever discussed this option.

    Parents especially your dad’s consent is very important and you seem to know that he will not consent to a Christian, so donot even bother. Such situation happens to even Muslim guys .
    The bottom line is to bring your faith first. I have seen girls who have not married because they have not had the opportunity to meet good characters guys , and Allah Allah they will be rewarded for their swaburu

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